February 12, 2025
By: Bill Conger
Angela Davis experienced an unspeakable tragedy in her life not once, but twice. The first loss occurred in 2010 when her husband died. She and her teenage son went to the Haven of Hope for grief counseling with therapist Kay Quintero.
“I felt like–and I think my son felt the same way when his father passed that—we were in a safe place and we knew that it was private,” said Davis, who agreed to share her experience for this story to help others. “We could just pour our heart out to her. It made us stronger to where we could move forward and talk about it with other people.”
So much so that her only son, Corporal Bryan Tyler Vanhoose used his trial to provide empathy to others grieving a loss.
“Whenever he joined the Marines, he was a strong advocate against suicide,” Davis says. “He would help certain people that was in the Marines, if they were having really difficult time, he would share his experience that he had, with his dad and addiction.”
In 2019, Davis’ son passed away suddenly and again, she returned for individual counseling. “I think you’re just so raw and you’re just so emotionally not good. You don’t want to live. I just felt safer with Kay for a while. I didn’t want to go talk about that with anyone else but her. She kind of got me back on my feet and got me to where I could plug through the day and head off to the next day.”
A few months after her son’s death, Davis and her second husband gave group counseling a try with Heart of the Cumberland in Cookeville.
“The group that I was in was mothers that had recently lost a child and that was really helpful. I guess it was six of us maybe in that small group and it was all women. There were some mothers that had just lost their child that month. One mother had lost her son and his girlfriend. They died in a car accident, and he had just turned 16. It really helped being with a group of individuals that are going through your same thing.”
Learning how to manage grief like Davis processed is something the Haven of Hope and Heart of the Cumberland would like to help with the people in DeKalb County. Later this month a workshop will be held on managing grief.
“This is for people who have suffered loss recently or in the past and would like to learn strategies and gain resources for coping with grief,” veteran therapist Kay Quintero said. “The Haven of Hope offer this comprehensive workshop featuring certified professional counselors from DeKalb County Haven of Hope. Sessions will be available for adults, teens, and children ages 4 and up.”
The adult seminar will include understanding the grief process, normal emotions for grief, coping strategies, meeting others where the common denominator is grief, differences in men and women grieving, what adults need to know about children grieving, and available resources for help. Licensed counselors will lead these classes with age level grief activities.
The grief workshop will be Saturday, February 22, 10:00 a.m. until 2:00 p.m. at Smithville First Baptist Church in the activities building, located at 101 West Church Street. Pre-registration is required . To register or for more information about costs, call the Haven of Hope at (615) 597-4673.